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Twisted Experience and TCW - View topic - TCW ENDGAME from Las Vegas, Nevada (July 25, 2007)
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 TCW ENDGAME from Las Vegas, Nevada (July 25, 2007) 
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Post TCW ENDGAME from Las Vegas, Nevada (July 25, 2007)


<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/KLUl8xkKSTk"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/KLUl8xkKSTk" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>

BAP! ~ BAP! ~ BAP! ~ BAP! ~ BAP! ~ BAP! ~ BAP! ~ BAP!


Image Image Image </center>

Tex: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the biggest show in TCW's calendar...the biggest show in pro. wrestling today...the greatest sports entertainment spectacle on earth...welcome, to THE ENDGAME!

Banter: I'm so excited, Tex! It's my favourite time of year - Endgame time!

Cain: We're here live in the sold out Thomas and Mack Center in Las Vegas, Nevada. They call it Sin City, but tonight it's Wresltle-in City!

Banter: Just what we need to start off the show - a horrible joke from Isaiah.

Cain: It wouldn't be TCW without it!

Tex: Tonight, David Hardy defends the Aftershock Championship against William Shamrock, the New City Saints challenge for the Tag Championships against Matt Stirkmore and DeSean Blackwell, Freya meets Kermit - potentially with the Bleeder Title on the line, of course, Matt Strikmore will defend the Transcontinental Title against Drakus, Subway Jack faces the awesome Duo, The Hammer, in what might be his last match for TCW, takes on old rival Acolyte and of course, we have tonight's main event...for the 411fed and ECF World's Championship; the rematch we've waited a year for...it's Darkness versus Dante II!

Cain: Stay tuned, everyone, this is going to be the greatest show of all time!

<center>Image Image

IC: "Time for the AS title match!"

Banter: "Yipee!"

(The camera points up the ramp as the music starts)

In this farewell
There's no blood
There's no alibi
‘Cause I've drawn regret
From the truth
Of a thousand lies

(Shamrock walks to the top of the ramp)

So let mercy come
And wash away
What I've done
(A pyro goes off in front of Shamrock, and small pyroes continue as he walks down the ramP

I'll face myself
To cross out what i've become
Erase myself
And let go of what i've done

Put to rest
What you thought of me
While I clean this slate
With the hands of uncertainty



For what I've done
I start again
And whatever pain may come
Today this ends
I'm forgiving what I've done!!!

Sammy Eubanks: "Making his way to the ring from Cold Spring Harbor, New York, he
weighs in tonight at 220 pounds, WILLIAAAM SHAMROCK!"

What I've done
Forgiving what I've done

The arena goes dark and silent before the opening guitar chords of Strapping Young Lad's "Shitstorm" begin playing. The screen flashes split second shots of David Hardy in action as blue lights flash in sync with the music.


Suddenly a massive explosion of fire erupts at the top of the ramp.

Know, know, KNOW
is WRONG!!!

David Hardy slowly steps out. He walks to either side of the stage and stares out at the audience with an enraged expression on his face.

Sammy: And introducing the Aftershock Champion. Weighing in at 200 pounds and hailing from West Vancouver, Canada. He is Infinity member, DAAAAAAVIIIIIID HAAAAARRRRDYYYYY!!!!

And I don't want to fight...
Because I don't know what's
But I'll do ANYTHING just to get some
FUCKING sleep tonight...
And I can't even EAT
And I can't even FUCKING PISS!!!
All I've been doing is thinking about

He paces back to the center of the ramp and stares towards the ring. You can almost see the fire burning in his eyes as Devin Townsend's shrieks fill the arena.


He finally steps forwards and approaches the ring. He looks from side to side, acting very paranoid of his surroundings.

You'll fucking listen to me...Every one of you in my
All I've been looking for is an excuse to
feel this way...
...and now I know...
I'm in control of the infinite mind,
And I control infinite Power

He takes his time and stands infront of the ring, where he will surely shed blood in the coming moments. His eyebrow seems to be twitching with pure madness.

And self-control is something I've learned...
But don't think I won't do it,
Don't you EVER forget;
If you want crazy...

He finally snaps out of it and charges forward, sliding into the ring and running towards the corner.


Hardy quickly jumps onto the turnbuckles and holds his arms out to the side, yelling out to the crowd.


The madness of the music slowly fades out as Hardy jumps down to the canvas and stares down the referee and Shamrock.

Hardy barely waits for the bell to ring before he hits Shamrock with a dropkick and sends him bouncing across the ring. Immediately, Hardy is on him and trying for a pin, but doesn't even get a one-count at this early stage. Shamrock is up on his feet, but Hardy brings him down with a snapmare. He holds on, locking in a reverse chinlock, but Shamrock reaches the ropes quickly and Hardy breaks it at the count of three.

Tex: Neither of these men are very popular with the fans, but they're both great wrestlers, so they're sure to put on a great show for everyone here tonight and watching at home.

Banter: Hardy doesn't care about winning over fans, Tex. He's the Aftershock Superstar!

Cain: Well Hardy has certainly brought a lot of prestige to the belt, and this is a tough defence for him. Shamrock is a rookie, but he's shown an awful lot of promise so far.

Shamrock massages his neck and the two lock up. This time Shamrock takes control, pulling Hardy into a vertical suplex. He drops a leg and goes for a cover...


Hardy kicks right out!

Tex: Shamrock wanted to get this over with quickly, but there was no way that was going to keep Hardy down.

Shamrock yanks Hardy roughly up to his feet and whips him into the corner. He looks to follow in with a clothesline, but Hardy manages to elbow him away and then charges, dropping Shamrock with a running enziguri. Hardy showboats for the crowd who boo him before lifting his opponent up and signalling for a big move. He spins Shamrock around and goes for the Olympic Slam, but Shamrock manages to counter it into a tornado DDT and Hardy eats mat. Shamrock takes his opportunity, hooking the Aftershock Champion's leg...


Tw...no! Kick out by Hardy!

Cain: That was certainly more effective. Shamrock is the FWRFed Revolution Champion, but he might find things a bit more competitive here in TCW.

Banter: Yeah, he's a big fish in a small pond over there. We eat guys from that busch league promotion for breakfast here in the big time.

Shamrock hammers Hardy with right hands on the mat and then lifts him up, dropping him with a brutal back suplex. He goes for another cover...


No! Hardy's shoulder comes up!

Tex: Shamrock is getting in as many covers as he can, it seems. If he can keep Hardy down he could prove a lot of detractors wrong.

Cain: Right. Beating David Hardy is a big coup for anyone, let alone a rookie like Shamrock.

Shamrock whips Hardy across the ring and tries a back body drop, but Hardy spins through and lands on his feet and grabs a waistlock before arcing backwards and driving Shamrock's neck and shoulders into the mat with a German suplex. Shamrock cradles his head as Hardy gets to his feet and shakes his whole body down. He lays in a stomp to Shamrock and then drags him into the centre of the ring and snaps in the Dragon Tamer.

Banter: Okay, this is over.

Tex: Hardy has one of his signature submission holds locked in, and surely now it's just a matter of time.

Cain: Better men have tapped out to this - there'd certainly be no shame in Shamrock submitting to this brutal move.

Shamrock is reaching desperately for the ropes, but he can't get to them as Hardy wrenches back, applying incredible pressure to his signature hold. Shamrock looks to be passing out from the pain and the official moves in, lifting his arm.

It falls once...


Thr...no! Shamrock's arm stays in the air and he starts to claw his way out of the hold. Slowly, he stumbles to his feet, lifting Hardy up with him. The Aftershock Superstar looks amazed and starts bouncing up and down, trying to bring Shamrock back down to the mat. Finally, Shamrock loses his footing but he falls right back into the turnbuckle, dislodging Hardy and sending him crashing to the mat.

Tex: Shamrock escapes the Dragon Tamer! What an impressive manoeuvre from this young star. Boy, I tell you, I don't much like his attitude, but I have to respect the talent he's displaying here.

Banter: Anyone can fall into a turnbuckle, Tex.

Both men are down now, but Shamrock is the first to rise. He rubs his damaged neck as he grabs a handful of Hardy's shoulder-length hair and spins him around, throwing him shoulder-first into the ring post. Hardy staggers out, holding his shoulder in pain and Shamrock immediately pulls him into a small package...



Hardy shifts, reversing the roll up so Shamrock is the one pinned...



Thre...no! Shamrock manages to kick out just in time!

Cain: Hardy reversed the pin, but it still wasn't enough!

Tex: That was such a close call for Shamrock, but he held on, and he's still in with a chance now.

Hardy seems revitalised from the near fall and begins to stomp the mat as he makes his way to the ropes. Shamrock stands up and Hardy charges, going for the Superkick, but Shamrock ducks and spins around behind Hardy. As the Aftershock Superstar turns to face his foe, Shamrock wraps an arm around his chest and falls to the mat, driving Hardy's head into the canvas.

Cain: Downward Spiral! Shamrock hits a huge move!

He goes for the pin...



Th...no! Not enough!

Tex: I thought for sure we had a new Aftershock Champion there, but Hardy shows the kind of tenacity that brought him to the dance and made him one of the most decorated champions in TCW history.

Shamrock pounds the mat in frustration. He gets to his feet and, as Hardy starts to stand, signals for the Money Clip. He hooks Hardy's arms, but the Aftershock Champion manages to halt the rotation and hurl Shamrock over his back to land hard on the mat.

Cain: Amazing agility from Hardy. There's no better high flier in TCW.

Tex: And now I think he's about to demonstrate that...

Hardy catches his breath and then looks to the turnbuckle. As the fans pop, he heads to the top and signals for the Sinton Bomb. He flies off, hurtling through the air, but Shamrock moves at the last second, and Hardy hits the mat, finding no one home.

Banter: Oh no!

However, the former RoXoR'z agility is such that he rolls through and back up to his feet and, as Shamrock stumbles up, expecting to see a downed opponent, Hardy hits the DKO from nowhere!

Tex: DKO! Hardy hits his most powerful move!

Hardy covers...




Cain: Hardy retains the Aftershock Championship! Shamrock fought hard, but it just wasn't enough tonight.

Tex: I have a feeling he'll get his chance again though. Shamrock may not have won tonight, but he showed everyone that he has a bright future in TCW.

"He expects a show two days ago, yo. Two. That's a lot of days."- :coren:

Thu Jul 26, 2007 12:48 am
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<center>Image Image Image Image

The scene cuts to a view of a locker room door. On it is a sign saying "Matt Strikmore" in simple, Arial font.

Tex: Up next, the double champion fan-favourite Matt Strikmore defends his tag belt against the team of JE and KID - the New City Saints.

Cain: And, what's more, he'll also meet Drakus to defend his TC belt later tonight. This man has a lot of heart, I'll give him that.

Banter: I won't. He's committing suicide - you both know what Drakus can do.

The door opens, and Strikmore steps out to a big pop. He has both of his belts slung over his shoulders and looks confident and calm. He begins to walk down the corridor, but suddenly something knocks the camera away and the view is obscured. Only the sounds of some kind of violent struggle can be heard.

Tex: What the hell?

Cain: Someone's attacking the camera guy!

A roar sounds and, finally, the cameraman gets himself in order and shows a shaky shot of the carnage in the corridor. Matt Strikmore is sprawled against a wall, his TC belt in hand. He breathes heavily and, soon, the source of his exertion is revealed as Drakus charges into shot. Strikmore smashes him across the face with the belt, and the monster goes reeling, but shakes his head to recover and charges again.

Tex: It's Drakus! We've seen this sort of thing from him before!

Cain: This doesn't look good...

Strikmore is speared into the brick wall, sending plaster raining down into his hair and Drakus picks him up before driving him neck-first into the concrete floor with a power bomb.

Tex: Oh my God! Strikmore's match is up next! What's going to happen here?

Cain: Folks, we've gotta go to the match...if there's even going to be one!

The shot cuts back to the arena, where Sammy Eubanks is in the ring.

Sammy: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall and it is for the TCE UNIFIED TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS! Introducing first...

As the music plays, JE, K.I.D and Jess (and Mr. Acceptable) come out onto the stage. JE wears his traditional leather jacket, but with NCS on the back while K.I.D wears some zip up jumper with a hood covering over his head. As they head down to the ring with, K.I.D high fives some of the fans, while JE keeps himself to himself and doesn't react to the fans. They enter the ring and K.I.D squats down to do his "X" and JE stand behind him and lifts up the devil fingers sign as they pose in front of the fans.

Sammy: The challengers, accompanied to the ring by Jess and Mr. Acceptable...from the Island of Mallorca...at a combined weight of 472 lbs...JE and KID...THE NEEEEW CIIIITY SAAAAAAAINTS!!!!

Tex: These guys are a promising young tag team who are looking to win big here tonight, and they may have had the Tag Titles dropped into their laps thanks to Drakus...

Sammy: And their opponents...first...

The whole arena goes black for a few seconds, on the Twistedtron the words The Technician appear on screen. The lights begin to flash blue and gold back and forth, the beginning of AFI's Miseria Cantare begings to play.

Sammy: From Greensboro, North Carolina...weighing in at 217 lbs...he is one half of the TCW UNIFIED TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS.... DESEEEEEEEAN BLAAAAAAAACKWEEEEEEELL!!!!

Love...Your Hate...Your...Faith loss...
You...Are Now...One...of us
Love...Your Hate...Your...Faith Loss...
You...Are Now...One...of us

The drums begin to vibrate throughout the entire arena

Nothing from nowhere, I'm no one at all

DeSean walks out wearing his trademark blue hoodie. With Singapore Cane in hand He walks slowly down the ramp, head up, talking trash to the fans in attendance. With the ROH title slung across his shoulder, he crosses his hands while he stands on top of the steel steps, he then walks across the apron.

Radiate, recognize one silent call

As we all form one dark flame... Incinerate

Tex: Boy, I tell you, DeSean is one hell of a competitor, but it's my belief that acquiring Strikmore as a partner has been pretty instrumental in this kid's success.

Banter: How can you say that? DeSean is a member of Infinity; he makes his own destiny.

Cain: Well, Infinity have been pretty quiet of late. And no one's debating that he made his own destiny - but how much of it is due to having Strikmore to help him out?

Banter: None of it.

Cain: We'll have to agree to disagree on that one.

As incinerate is shouted, DeSean flips the hood back and out stretches his arms. He jumps on the top rope and back flips in. In one motion, he pounds his fist on the mat and points to the sky, blue and gold pyro goes off in the background.

DeSean takes up position in the ring opposite the New City Saints and rolls his neck. The arena falls silent, waiting for Sammy to announce Stirkmore, but nothing happens. The ring announcer glances at the curtain and fiddles with his earpiece.

Tex: It looks like we're missing Strikmore...oh...wait!

A shape rolls out of the curtain ad gradually resolves itself into the stumbling form of Strikmore. Sammy is about to start the announcement when Drakus appears too and lifts Strikmore off his feet. He hurls the double champion down the ramp to roll into a crumpled heap.

Cain: Drakus seems to have fought with Strikmore all the way from the back!

Referees spill onto the stage, holding Drakus back. Someone hands Stirkmore his belts and the young man staggers to his feet and tries to make his way down the aisle as Drakus is dragged away, roaring with rage.

Tex: Strikmore seems to have taken one hell of a beating - how useful is he going to be to DeSean in this match?

Banter: He's not even bleeding. Get up, you pussy!

Strikmore, in no shape to fight, gestures DeSean to start the match with KID. JE eyes the Transcontinental and Tag Champion carefully and murmurs advice to his brother. The bell rings and DeSean and KID circle. DeSean makes a few attempts to engage the rookie, but KID bats him away. DeSean attacks again, but KID manages to get underneath him and brings him down with a fireman carry. He grabs a chickenwing hold, but DeSean manages to twist out of it before KID can lock it in on both arms and gets a hammerlock.

Tex: Some nice mat work from these two men. They're both excellent technical wrestlers.

Cain: They sure are. Normally I'd say this match would be an great exhibition of pure wrestling, but with Strikmore in the condition he's on, I'm not sure that's going to be the case.

DeSean grabs KID by the chin and tries to wrap his arm around his head, but KID rolls over, depositing DeSean on the mat. He rolls on top of him, pressing his shoulders against the canvas...

Tex: KID has DeSean in a pinning predicament!


DeSean pushes KID over, pinning his shoulders to the mat instead...


KID kicks out and bounces up to his feet, and DeSean floors him with an arm drag. He locks in an arm bar but KID rolls up, reversing it into a hammerlock and then jumping up, scissoring DeSean's head between his thighs and spinning him across the ring with a modified ‘rana.

Cain: Great reversal from KID there. This is his big chance to shine tonight, here at the biggest show of the year.

Banter: The thing to remember about KID is that, no matter how well he does, if he wants to celebrate all he can do is drink a can of coke. What a retard.

Tex: You don't need drugs or alcohol to have a good time, Banter.

Banter: Yes you do. Don't be ridiculous. America was built on drugs and alcohol. Aren't you a patriot, Tex?

DeSean picks himself up as KID shakes himself off and then tags in JE. DeSean considers tagging in his own partner, but Strikmore is still slumped in his corner, holding onto the tag rope limply. DeSean sighs and heads towards JE, who charges, only to be brought down by a drop toehold from the quicker Tag Champion. DeSean jumps forward and yanks JE's head up, quickly snapping his arm around his throat and then grabbing his other arm.

Cain: DeSean with a dragon sleeper - this could be all over!

JE reaches towards the ropes, but KID comes in and breaks up the hold. Strikmore looks up blearily, and seems about to step in to the ring, but the referee is already forcing KID back to his corner. DeSean works over JE, picking him up and then dropping him with a back suplex. He goes for a pin...


Tw...no, JE kicks out!

Tex: A near fall there, but DeSean is fighting this match on his own for all intents and purposes.

Cain: Yeah, this is almost exactly what happened to DeSean at Friction a show or two back against Darkness and Freya. Strikmore's here this time, but Drakus has still made a complete mess of him, just like last time.

DeSean pulls JE up by his hair, but he elbows The Technician in the stomach and whips him across the ring. DeSean attempts a clothesline, but JE ducks and then hits a leg lariat. He presses his advantage, lifting DeSean up by the midsection. He goes for a piledriver, but DeSean reverses and throws JE through the air with a back body drop. JE lands hard, but manages to roll up to his feet. As DeSean turns around, JE charges him and hits a big spear.

Banter: Oof!

Tex: A big move from JE - this could be all over!

JE goes for a pin...



Th...DeSean just kicks out!

Cain: So close to new tag team champions there!

JE lifts DeSean up and whips him into his own corner, before following him and tagging in KID. The younger of the two brothers hops through the ropes and throws a right hand at DeSean. He pulls him out of the corner and then hooks his arm before spinning around and turning him inside out with a lariat.

Tex: He calls that move the KID Twist!

Banter: It looks kind of familiar. Isn't there some other guy who does that?

Cain: Nothing's new in wrestling, Banter...

Banter: Sure, but there's something really familiar about KID. When I watch him, I feel like I'm getting déjà vu...

KID goes for a pin...



Thr...and Strikmore comes out of nowhere to break it up, but falls to the mat straight away from the effort.

Tex: Strikmore manages to break it up! He has reserves of strength we didn't know about, obviously.

KID rolls up to his feet and stomps down both his opponents, kicking Strikmore towards the ropes and then lifting up DeSean. He signals for his finisher, but DeSean knees him in the gut and drops him with a DDT. He goes for a pin right away, but JE is in the ring to break it up before the referee's hand can slap the mat even once. He tries to attack DeSean, but Strikmore elbows the back of his head. JE stumbles into the centre of the ring and Strikmore, shaking his head to recover, follows him. As JE turns he lifts him up into an inverted fireman carry, takes a few steps forward and then throws him face-first into the mat!

Cain: The Money's Pier Plunge! JE has been taken out of this match!

Strikmore and JE are both down now and DeSean climbs to his feet. He checks everyone is down and, seeing KID staggering to his feet, he jogs to the corner arcross form him and mounts the turnbuckle. As KID turns around, he flies off the top rope, hitting the rookie with the Alpha Flight. DeSean gets up and, checking JE is still out of action, he signals for his finisher. KID is up and DeSean moves in, lifting his opponent up onto his shoulders.

Tex: DeSean is going for the Hangman's DDT!

Suddenly, KID reverses, spinning out of DeSean's grip and landing behind him. DeSean can't react fast enough as KID reaches between his legs and rolls him up into a school boy...


Strikmore is up on his knees, making his way towards his partner...


He dives towards KID, but his feet give way beneath him and he falls short...


Cain: Strikmore couldn't make it time! We've got new Tag Team Champions!

Tex: The New City Saints win! What a huge victory for these two young men, but what does this mean for DeSean Blackwell and Matt Strikmore?

Banter: Strikey didn't even get tagged in!

<center>Image Image

Tex: "This match shall be quite the sight...."

Subway Jack appears in the ring, no music or anything, he was very sneaky.

Banter: "WTF?"

Junior Kickstart begins to play, pumping up the crowd, as Duo appear on the ramp. Elsie is jumping and ready for action. She keeps up the crowd's energy while heading quickly towards the ring. Cage follows close behind her, remaining focused. He makes no indication that he even notices the crowd. Elsie heads to the corner, climbing the turnbuckle, keeping the crowd going, while Cage climbs into the ring, his massive form taking center-stage.

Sammy: "In the ring being accompanied by Elsie weighing in at 400 pounds, standing at a huge 7 feet, ladies and gentlemen this is CAAAGE."

IC: "Here we go."

Subway Jack slinks away from Cage, making himself as small a target as possible in one corner. At ringside, Elsie looks concerned, clearly unsure of who she should be rooting for. Cage advances slowly on his much, much smaller opponent, moving with all the subtlety of an angry glacier.

Tex: Well, this has the potential to be a very short match indeed.

Banter: It's such a shame - Subway Jack reminds me of a poorer, less handsome version of me. Now he's going to be road kill.

Cain: Well, Jack acquitted himself well at Havoc against William Shamrock. He has hidden reserves of almost suicidal toughness and willpower. That might be what he needs to survive the assault of a monster like Cage.

Cage suddenly charges, covering the space between himself and Jack with terrifying speed. Even so, Jack is quicker and manages to duck underneath one of Cage's massive arms before rolling to his feet in the centre of the ring. He holds up his hands, attempting to calm the giant down, but it has no discernable effect and Cage charges again. This time Jack dives right out of the ring, sliding out beneath the bottom rope.

Tex: I think Jack has had enough of this...

Banter: He's a smart guy. Something else we have in common.

The rapid Romeo once against tries to placate the beast, before checking his means of escape up the aisle. Clearly beginning to think better of being in this match at all, he starts to back away from the ring as the referee counts. Still moving with the same icy calm, Cage climbs over the ropes and jumps to the floor, sending a noticeable tremor around the ringside area. He starts to follow Jack up the ramp and the smaller wrestler finally cringes and turns tail, running away from Cage.

Cain: Yep, I think Jack's had his fill of Cage already.

Jack is quick on his feet, but Cage's legs are longer and his grey body is all muscle. The giant catches his opponent before he can escape and lifts him by the back of his shirt. With a might heave, Jack is hurled down towards the ring. Some of his progress is airborne, but much of it is spent rolling down the ramp before hitting the side of the ring and flopping half-underneath the apron.

Elsie rushes towards Jack, concerned for him, but Cage is bearing down on the two of them. The red-haired girl stands up to her protector and can be heard pleading for Jack who is now up on his knees, rubbing his skull. Hearing the referee's count, he slides into the ring, hoping to win on a technicality, but Cage sees his plan and steps past Elsie, climbing into the ring as the referee reaches ten.

Tex: They almost got counted out there, but this match, much to Subway Jack's regret, is going to continue it seems.

Banter: I'm not sure I can bear to watch...

Cain: And yet you are.

Banter: My job is to watch people getting beaten up. I am dedicated to these fans and delivering them high quality announcing.

Cain: And being a sadist is just a happy coincidence?

Banter: Exactly.

Jack, his plan having failed, once again tries backing away and pleading for his life, but Cage has no interest in being appeased. He charges Jack again, reaching out to envelope him in his immense grip, but Jack rolls away. He bounces off the ropes behind Cage and hits him with a clothesline, only to simply bounce back onto the mat, landing in a sitting position.

Cage picks Jack up by the shoulders and into the air, and the wily bum kicks out, his foot connecting with Cage's face. The giant staggers back, but doesn't lose his grip on Jack. He tries again, lashing out at his assailant, and this time Cage relinquishes his grip. Sadly, this just causes him to drop Jack to the mat - a fall of about ten feet.

Tex: Jack is trying to fight back, but it seems like it's only a matter of time until Cage gets hold of him and ends this.

As Cage shakes his head and rubs at his skull, Jack is picking himself up slowly. He cringes at the referee, tugging at his striped shirt in an attempt to convince him that this match is self-evidently unfair and should be called off - preferably in his favour. Cage advances again, but as Jack converses with the official, he kicks back, catching Cage between the legs.

Cain: Jack distracted the referee, and he may have turned the tide but...uh...

Banter: Wow, Cage is even tougher than he looks!

Grinning, Jack turns around, expecting to see a fallen giant, but Cage is still looming over him. Somewhere between fascination and terror, Jack looks down at Cage's crotch and throws another experimental kick. The referee is about to call for the bell but, since it seems to have no discernable effect on Cage, decides to let the infraction slide.

Banter: He's not human!

Cain: What was it that gave it away? The fact that he's eight feet tall or his grey skin?

Jack goes on the run again, but Cage grabs the back of his pants and hauls him into the air before releasing at the apex of the throw, sending Jack crashing into the mat face-first. The monster rolls him over and presses a knee against his smaller opponent's chest, pinning him to the mat...




Tex: Mercifully, this match appears to be over...

Banter: Subway Jack put up a good fight.

Cain: No he didn't.

Banter: Oh yeah. Well...whatever...

<center>Image Image

The arena lights cut out. As the opening notes of "Kerosene" play, a few red lights illuminate the arena. On the tron, black-and-white images of rural squalor flash -- boarded-up storefronts, rusted cars on garbage-littered front lawns, old bums in stained shirts on their porches drinking malt liquor from bags, bloated dead animals on the side of the road.

"I was born in this town, lived here my whole life.
Probably come to die in this town, lived here my whole life.
Never anything to do in this town, lived here my whole life.
Never anything to do in this town, lived here my whole life.
Probably learn to die in this town, lived here my whole life."

The images continue, becoming a series of shots of one run-down house with peeling paint in the middle of a vast, empty expanse. Shots of the inside show piles of disintegrating old magazines, cigarette-burned carpet, an ancient TV with a cracked screen and piles of moldy dishes in a disgusting, roach-infested kitchen.

"Probably come to die in this town, lived here my whole life.
There's kerosene around, something to do.
There's kerosene around, she's something to do.
There's kerosene around, she's something to do.
There's kerosene around, find something to do
There's kerosene around, she's something to do.
Kerosene around, SET ME ON FIRE!"

Suddenly the black-and-white image of the old house is obliterated by a burst of flame that becomes a wall of fire. In front of the entrance, pillars of flame shoot up from the ground. A large man, head draped in a ragged black cloth, emerges between the pillars of fire, grunting and snorting smoke.

"Set me on fire, kerosene.
Set me on fire, kerosene.

Climbing into the ring, Drakus removes the cloth from his head, streches both arms and unleashes a primal scream of rage.

Sammy: "Weighing in tonight at 280 pounds, he is from Anderson, Indiana, this is the monster known as DRAKUUUSS!"

Tex: "He is scary."

Banter: "He is my brotha right there!"

The drum beats of "Battle of One" start as white lights strobe to the beat. The guitar riff starts, and blue strobes join the white lights. As the singer screams, Matt Strikmore makes his way through the entrance way. Wearing long brown tights with blue details, Matt rolls his neck before heading down the ramp. There's very little fanfare, just the occasional slapping of a fans hand without looking away from the ring. Sliding under the bottom rope, Matt quickly jumps back up to his feet before lightly jogging in place while shaking out his arms.

Sammy: "In the ring he is the TC champ, from Wildwood, New Jersey, weighing in at a muscular 220 pounds, this is MATT STRIIIIIIKMOOOORE!"

Banter: Strikmore looks a bit worse for wear tonight.

Tex: You sound surprised, to say that Strikmore has had a rough night thus far is an understatment.

Cain: How true, the beating at the hands of Drakus he suffered has to have take a heavy toll on him.

Strikmore limps up to the referee and hands him the Transcontinental title belt. The referee holds the belt up and then calls for the bell.

Banter: As far as I see it, this will be a mauling.

Tex: Don't discount Strikmore, the TC champion has more fight in him then a room full of English football hooligans.

Strikmore signals for a lock up that Drakus ignores with a grin before nailing the title defender with a right hand punch that makes Strikmore see stars. Strikmore staggers back from the fell blow delivered by the mammoth Drakus and as he does, the grin grows wider on Drakus face

Tex: Drakus looks like the Goliath of the bible compared to Strikmore.

Cain. Remember that David slew Goliath

Both Tex and Banter look at Cain and shake their heads.

Banter: Fixed matches existed in pre-historic times as well...

Drakus grabs hold of Strikmore and swings him to the canvas with what seems to be a poor but deadly belly to belly suplex. As the New Jersey native's back hits the canvas, the force with which Drakus delivered the moves makes him bounce.

As if to add injury to injury, Drakus lifts his boot off the canvas.

Cain: Drakus looks to stomp Strikmore's face into the canvas!

As the boot comes down with a thud that reverberates through the arena, the beaten down but far from out Strikmore dodges the silver bullet and mounts an onslaught of blows that end with Strikmore dropping the behemoth with a DDT after a kick to the mid section.

Tex: Cover by Strikmore!

Strikmore only gets a two count before the leviathan of the TCW tosses him off and raises back to his feet.

Cain: Is there anything Strikmore can throw at Drakus to keep the big bastard down? I mean even though it's a submission match, still he can't keep him down...

Tex: Doesn't look like it, I doubt Matt can use his finisher Morey's Pier Plunge after the beating he took earlier today, it seems that for Drakus, this match began long before the bell rung.

Undeterred by Drakus return to form, Strikmore bounces off the ropes in an attempt to bring the mammoth down again. As he dashes towards Drakus he sees that the large man extends his arm, but as he is unable to block the hit, Matt Strikmore takes the full blast of a clothesline from Drakus across his chest.

Drakus picks the dizzy Strikmore off of the canvas by pulling him up by the hair. Strikmore's lungs gets emptied of air by a blow to the stomach before he gets to meet the canvas back first via a choke slam by Drakus.

Tex: Drakus looks like he's ready to finish this one!

The large man dives on top of Strikmore for a cover.


Ref: "It's a submission match what don't you understand Drakus?"

Drakus curses and drags the still woozy TC champion to his feet. A series of punches send Strikmore back to the canvas in a heap. A few seconds after Strikmore hits the canvas, Drakus follows him down with an elbow that makes the groggy champion see stars.

Drakus picks his opponent up and whips him into the corner, he smirks before he charges Strikmore, just as the defender is about to be flattened by the violent charge, he dodges out of the way.

Tex: Strikmore played possum!

Driven by a mixture of rage and desperation, Strikmore launches a violent outburst of punches, chops and kicks at Drakus. As his fist slams into the skull of Drakus for the last time he hooks the giant's head and runs forward dropping him face first on the canvas with a bulldog.

With a determined look on his face, Strikmore pulls Drakus up to his feet and introduces the huge man to the soles of his feet via a dropkick.

Tex: Strikmore follows the dropkick up with an elbow drop and goes for the cover!


Cain: What is wrong with these men going for counts?

Banter: Drugs?

Tex: Drakus is up and looking for some revenge!

As Drakus gets to his feet, Strikmore bounces of the ropes and delivers a forceful shining wizard.

Tex: "What a kick!"

Drakus staggers to his feet only to be met by a kick in the midsection.

Banter: I can't believe this!

Tex: Matt Strikmore is an incredible man, but this just reeks of desperation!

By applying every ounce of his strength, Strikmore lifts the giant on to his shoulders. He pauses for a few seconds as the crowd showers him with cheers as he takes a step forward.

Cain: Morey's Pier Plunge on the way!

Banter: No way, he can't keep that weight on his shoulders!

As Strikmore takes his second step forward Drakus shifts his weight and thus forces Strikmore to drop him. As the irate Matt Strikmore turns around he is the recipient of a boot to the midsection, a hand around his throat and the second choke slam of the night.

The champion looks like a limp sack of flour as Drakus picks him up, throws him on his shoulders and prepares to deliver the Psycho driver. Before he launches into the move the monster whispers.

"This move put Dante in a wheel chair, somehow I doubt you will bounce back like the albino asshole did."

Strikmore hears that and gets down and CACTUS clotheslines Drakus out of the ring.

And the Ref starts a ten count.

IC: They are just brawling!

The Ref is up to five.

They're almost backstage now!



The ref goes over to Sammy and tells him something...

Sammy: "Ladies and gentlemen I have just been informed that due to a double count out decision the title is now VACANT!"

The crowd goes insane!

Tex: "Wow what a bold move by the ref!"

Banter: "He should just give the title to Drakus!"

Wait now they come back out and Drakus has Strikmore in a Psycho Driver position....


Banter: "He's dead my gawd he is dead."

An ambulance comes out about a minute later to take him away.

Banter: "I hope I get to go to the funeral."

"He expects a show two days ago, yo. Two. That's a lot of days."- :coren:

Thu Jul 26, 2007 12:58 am
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Unintentionally Hilarious
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Joined: Fri May 14, 2004 8:17 pm
Posts: 1816
Location: Cali,Bitch
<center>Image Image

Flash of pyro kicks off the music. Kermit enters slowly, yet determined. Focused gaze in his eyes, twisted smile on his face. Lights dim. Kermit walks slowly down the ramp.

A seed of doubt
It exists
And it grows
A glimpse of life
From somewhere deep within
Awake and understand

Lights flash at "awake and understand". Light continue to flash around the arena as Kermit makes his way down the ramp.

Is there anyone else here?
Somebody screaming
Please help me
Let's find out now
That I am not dreaming
Welcome to my damnation
Here it comes the real me

I didn't know
I couldn't hear the answer
My mind was blank
I should have known
I hold it back but somehow
There is someone else
Another stranger me
Another stranger me

Kermit hits the ring at the start of the next verse.

When the ice
Will break away

Kermit is now in the ring pacing slowly while keeping his attention to the ramp. Next verse, he is on the top of a turn buckle, arms raised.

I can't get out here
Cause none of my keys
Fit the door
There's fear and anger
Hate and love
I must confess
It's out of hand

Next verse, Kermit starts taunting the fans.

It's cynic
It's cynic
Still cynic
All my laughter

It's cynic
Just manic
It's cynic
All her laughter

If there's anyone in
It soon will be over
We'll burn out
Our soul's aflamed
And we're on our own now
Give up you cruel invasion
You're insane I'll show you

Sammy: "Making his way to the ring from Chicago, weighing in at 230 pounds he is the Bleeder champ, this is KERRRRMIIIIIIIT!"


Faint white figures paint my sleep
Please don't tell my secrets keep them hidden (you got it, you got it, you got it)
If the words that matter reach your face from floor
Will you be wondering if, or (do I need what is given or honest)
Does it cost me scarring if the words stay true
Even number your nephew (I don't want it, don't want it, don't want it anymore)

An explosion sounds above the entrance ramp, sending golden pyro raining down.

And when the answer that you want
Is in the question that you state
Come what may!
Come what may!

And when the answer that you want
Is in the question that you state
Come what may!
Come what may!

Freya walks down the ramp, signalling to her fans with points and grins.

In a pain that buckles out your knees
Could you stop this if I plead (you got it, you got it, you got it)
So destined I am to walk among the dark
A child in keeping secrets from (will they know what I've done in the after)
In the sought for matter when the words blame you
In a blood red summer I'll give you (I don't want it, don't want it, don't want it)

Freya hops up into the ring and climbs the turnbuckle and raises an arm, smiling at her many fans.

And when the answer that you want
Is in the question that you state
Come what may!
Come what may!

And when the answer that you want
Is in the question that you state
Come what may!
Come what may!

Sammy: "Making her way to the ring, from Oxford U.K., she weighs in tonight at a slender 143 pounds, ladies and gentlemen this is FREEYA GREEEEEN!"


Freya hops lightly from one foot to the other in the centre of the ring. Kermit cracks his neck and advances on her as the bell rings, but she's too quick for him and brings him down to the mat with a drop toehold. She hops forward into a side headlock, but Kermit throws her off and trips her. Immediately he grabs her leg and flips over into a jacknife pin...

One...but Freya kicks out straight away.

Cain: Kermit gets a quick pin there. He's going to have to keep that kind of pace up if he wants to match Freya - we've seen how fast and agile she is.

Tex: Definitely. Too many men have underestimated this young woman, not least of whom was perhaps Darkness at Havoc.

Cain: I think this is a rare situation of the male wrestler being the underdog - Kermit's been highly successful in his time in TCW, but Freya's record speaks for itself.

Kermit rolls to his feet and looks for an opening, but Freya executes an arm drag and then holds on, twisting Kermit's arm behind him. He winces in the hold, but manages to get upright and flip her over his back. Freya lands on her feet however and hits a dropkick, sending Kermit staggering back against the ropes. Freya whips him across the ring and then attempts a hurracanrana on the way back, but he reverses, hurling Freya off his shoulders. She flips backwards however, landing neatly on her feet. The two stand off for a second and the crowd politely applauds.

Tex: Amazing sequence of reversals there.

Banter: Pfft...whatever. This isn't about showboating to the crowd - these two should be concentrating on beating the hell out of each other.

They begin to circle again, and this time Kermit strikes in time, ducking behind Freya and flooring her with a German suplex. He grabs her leg and tries for a half crab, but Freya twists her way out and buries her foot in the Bleeder Champion's abdomen. She's back up to her feet in an instant and kicks Kermit again, but he catches it. Freya responds by jumping up and nailing him with a big enziguri. She covers...


Tw...no! Kermit kicks out.

Cain: A near fall for Freya there. If she can keep up this pace, Kermit isn't going to know what's hit him.

Tex: Remember, folks, this match isn't technically for the Bleeder Title - if Freya makes Kermit bleed, however, she will be eligible to pin him and become a two-time Bleeder Champion.

Cain: And what an honour that would be. Coren is the only one to have held this title more than once.

Freya lifts Kermit by his hair, cringing as she wipes off the grease on her tights. She whips him into the corner and then follows him in, throwing him across the ring with a monkey flip. The crowd are firmly behind Freya and she goes up high, waiting for Kermit to stand again. As he does, she leaps from the turnbuckle, landing on his shoulders and flexing back, attempting a hurracanrana, but Kermit keeps his footing and stops her, pulling her back up onto his shoulders and then driving her back down into the mat with a brutal powerbomb.

Tex: What a reversal!

Banter: This is more like it. Snap her in half, Kermit!

He pins...



Freya kicks out!

Cain: A close one there, but Freya's tenacity is well documented.

Kermit gets up to one knee, slapping his hands at the ref, but, upon being told that it was definitely two, he goes back to Freya, grabbing her by the back of the head and hammering her with right hands to the face. He lifts her up and executes a smooth vertical suplex. Kermit gets up and waits for Freya to stand, slapping his thigh as he does so.

Tex: It looks like the Bleeder Champion may be signalling for the Kermit Kick...

The girl groggily gets to her feet and Kermit charges, throwing his leg out, but she ducks and chops him as he spins ‘round. She fights him to the ropes and then whips him across the ring, but he jumps over her as she charges.

Banter: Hey, a leapfrog! Literally!

Freya bounces back off the opposite ropes and tries a tornado DDT, going high into the air, but Kermit reverses in mid rotation and dumps her over the ropes and out of the ring. He grabs the ropes and immediately vaults over, crashing into Freya with a slingshot body press.

Tex: This one has spilled out of the ring. There are no disqualifications in this match, so there won't be anyone getting counted out.

Banter: They might fight through the entire arena!

Cain: Or all of Vegas, if they feel so inclined.

Kermit is first up and whips Freya into the guardrail. He charges and clotheslines her over and into the crowd.

Tex: It looks like your prediction may be right, Banter...

The fans are cleared out of the way by security personnel as Kermit climbs over the barrier and stomps Freya down. He picks her up, but she drops to her knees while holding the back of his head and sends him staggering back with a jawbreaker. Kermit stumbles ‘round and Freya immediately grabs his head and DDTs him into the concrete floor.

Cain: I think Kermit has been busted open by the impact of that DDT!

Tex: He sure has, Isaiah, and now this match has a new dimension - if Kermit is pinned now, the Bleeder Title will change hands.

Kermit struggles up to his feet, blinking the blood from his eyes as Freya leads him back to the barrier, but he pulls himself away and floors her with a right hand. He pounds on her some more before picking her up and Irish whipping her down the aisle between seats into a metal barrier. She bounces back and Kermit runs up behind her, dropping her with a clothesline to the back of the head. He hooks her up for another vertical suplex, but this time turns and drops her over the metal railing.

Banter: Ouch!

Cain: Just to clear up any confusion for viewers watching at home; ordinarily, the Bleeder Champion, assuming he or she is bleeding, can be pinned anywhere in order to lose the title as long as it's during a TCW broadcast, but because this is a sanctioned match, falls only count in the ring.

Banter: But Freya could just pin him once the match is over and win it, right?

Cain: Uh...I suppose...

Banter: Man, it sucks to be Bleeder Champion...

Kermit takes control now, stomping Freya down and leading her up into the crowd again. The fans are cheering at the wanton destruction on display as Kermit signals and lifts Freya up, going for another powerbomb, but one which will drive her down into the concrete steps at their feet. He brings her down, but Freya reverses, spinning Kermit through the air with a hurracanrana that sends him tumbling down the steps to land in a heap on the floor. He attempts to stand, but falls back to land flat out on the floor.

Tex: This match is intense back-and-forth action - Freya has taken Kermit out it seems.

Cain: That fall down the steps was a pretty nasty tumble. She needs to press her advantage and finish this one.

Seeing an opportunity, Freya pulls herself back together and runs along the row of seats, pushing fans out of the way. She climbs over another rail and is now stood on a ledge some ten feet above Kermit, overlooking the Bleeder Champion far below. She pauses for a second, waiting for the fans to get behind her, before throwing herself off, spinning through the air multiple times in what ends up being a 810 degree splash. She lands on Kermit and the crowd cheers wildly, but both wrestlers are feeling the effects of the death-defying move.

Tex: Incredible manoeuvre!

Cain: A huge, high-risk move from Freya, and I think that's the end of Kermit, but it's also taken its toll on Freya!

Freya is finally the first to move, slowly getting to her feet. She stomps Kermit and then tries to pick him up, but the Bleeder Champion isn't moving, and collapses back down to the concrete below in a puddle of blood. She stomps him once more and then manages to heave him up and push him towards the barrier at ringside.

Tex: Freya has to get Kermit into the ring to finish this, but I don't think he wants to go.

Banter: Would you?

He stumbles forward a few feet before toppling over. She repeats the action, slowly forcing Kermit towards the barrier in five-foot increments before she causes him to trip over the barrier and tumble back into the ringside area. The crowd cheers as she vaults over the barrier herself and drags Kermit to the ring, rolling him in under the bottom rope.

Cain: It looks like this match is finally back where it belongs.

She hooks his leg as she climbs in after him...



Thr...no! Kermit's shoulder lifts from the mat just in time!

Tex: Amazing! The fortitude of Kermit in this match is astonishing!

Banter: I can't believe he kicked out!

Freya raises her eyebrows in surprise, but is otherwise unperturbed by her opponent's tenacity as she lifts him again, grabbing him around the head and moving towards the corner. She grips him over her shoulder and mounts the turnbuckle. The crowd cheers as she pushes off, spinning through the air, but Kermit reverses, hurling her off him to land hard on the mat.

Cain: Freya went for the Lunar Eclipse, the move with which she pinned Darkness at Havoc, but Kermit reversed in mid-air. There's obviously some fight left in the Bleeder Champion!

Tex: This is an amazing contest; both competitors have a lot to be proud of, no matter the outcome.

Kermit staggers down to the mat, his legs giving way, and rolls out of the ring. Freya is still down as he falls to the floor, supporting himself using the side of the ring. His face is a mess of blood and, slowly, he makes his way to the announce tables and retrieves the Bleeder Championship from the timekeeper.

Banter: Oooh, watch out!

Tex: What does Kermit have planned here? It's no-DQ, but this isn't going to be pretty.

The champion climbs slowly back into the ring, taking a few seconds to recover himself as he rests on his knees. He holds the Bleeder Title in front of him as blood drips down from his forehead, adding more crimson stains to the dull silver surface of the belt.

Cain: Kermit adds his blood to the Bleeder Championship. Nothing sums up the prestige and heritage of this belt more than the bloodstains of its former holders and challengers. I think there's enough of Coren, Dante, Highone, Tweeder, Baroness and dozens more in that thing that they can call it a relative.

Freya is beginning to stand now, holding her head and Kermit shakily rises. As she turns he charges, using the Bleeder Title as a weapon that smashes into her head and sends her down to the mat with a cut near her hairline.

Tex: Oh! Now Freya is bleeding!

Cain: Kermit took her out with that belt, which is perfectly legal in this match, and this one is now surely academic!

Kermit throws himself on top of her...



Thre...no! Freya just kicks out!

Tex: No! What toughness and willpower we are seeing from this young woman tonight!

Kermit can't believe it and he collapses down beside the ropes. He's lost a lot of blood now and wipes the dark liquid from his eyes as he watches Freya roll over onto her side, clutching at her own bloody forehead.

Cain: Both of these competitors are losing blood. They've fought all across the arena and they look exhausted, but one of them must triumph and whichever of them it is will walk out of this match the Bleeder Champion.

Banter: I don't think anyone's walking out of this match...

Kermit now makes his way to his feet by using the ropes, he is stalking Freya...

IC: Looks like he's going for the KERMIT Kick!

He swings his leg, but FREYA DUCKED!

She then goes behind Kermit, grabs his neck puts her knees against his back and falls down.

Tex: "LUNGBLOWER!!!!!!!!!"






IC: "She did it, she did it with the lungblower!"

Freya celebrates, but Kermit is still lying on the ground.

Trainers, EMTs, referees are down there.

Kermit is not moving.

Banter: "Uh oh."

The have to get a stretcher, and they put him on it and they rush him to the hospital right away.

Freya has a disturbed look on her face.

IC: "If you see on the replay, Freya's knees went directly into Kermit's back."

Tex: "Oh gawd."

But Freya doesn't let that bother her too much as she receives the cheers from the audience.

<center>Image Image

The arena goes pitch black, like really black. Then one light shines on the rampway.

Then the music starts.

blah blah blah bla blah

You were everything I wanted.
You were everything a girl could be.
Then you left me brokenhearted
Now you don't mean a thing to me
All I wanted was your
Love love love love love love

Hate is a strong word
But I really really really don't like you
Now that it's over
I don't even know what I liked about you
Brought you around
And you just brought me down.
Hate is a strong word.
But I really really really don't like you.

I really don't like you.

Banter: "Holy shit that song was emo."

Tex: "Only for our friend here..."

Sammy: "Weighing in at a big muscular 278 pounds, hailing from HELL'S Kitchen, New York, he is the King of Emo, ACOOLYYYTE!!!!"

The chorus of boos rain down on the man in white. As he's walking towards the ring a white cross appears in middle of the ring, then two seconds later, it is set on fire.

IC: "OH.-MY.-GOD!"

Banter: "This remind you of back home, Tex?"

Tex: "Haha yea....NO gawd you racist asshole."

IC: "What kind of message is he trying to send? Is he playing the reverse racist card?"

Acolyte kneels down to the cross and then proceeds to kick it over, and tears off his robe; to reveal a set of hair with streaks of black, eye-liner, and black nail polish.

Banter: "Jesus this guy is one EMO pussy."

IC: "As Aco continues to offend America and the world let's do a run-down of the build up to this match..."

Tex: "Well it all started around last year's Road to Glory Acolyte turned on the fan-faved faction- Ghetto Grass, he has bounced around different stables and ended up in the NHFC.."

IC: "On the other end of the spectrum Mutaaz Tareef TCW's most popular wrestler over a span of four years; acquired Ghetto Grass as full time employees, and has since been a former tag champ with one of them and has even injured the main guy behind the faction- Purple Camo."

Banter: "And now this emo asshole wants to take Alexxx away from him and end Hammer's career on a bad note for the Original Muslim 'G."

Guitar riffs and we get the old school Ghetto Grass theme blaring over the loudspeaker...

Your eyes tell the stories of a day you wish you could
Recall the moments that once have
Retract the footsteps that brought us to this favor
I wouldn't ask this of you

Good eye, sniper
Here I'll shoot, you run
The words you scribbled on the walls
With the loss of friends you didn't have
I'll call you when the time is right
Are you in or are you out?
For them all to know the end of us aaaallll...

The crowd erupts in applause for Ghetto Grass.

Banter: "What the hell are they doing here? They're not involved in this match?"

IC: "Well they aren't physically involved but emotionally most definitely."

Sammy: "Making their way to the ring they are the world's highest stable, Jay, Silent Bob, Limey, Brickey, Yasmin, STONER & Ghetto Fire, this is GHETTO GRAAAAAASSSSS!"


Tex: "Who's that following them there?"

IC: "Why, Tex I do believe those are, Moe, Larry, & Curly..!"


Amazingly there's a whole empty row at the Thomas & Mack Center, just enough for everyone. Except Jay & Silent Bob they prefer standing against the guardrail.

Tex: "Who the hell just took Sammy Eubanks place?"

IC: "Why I believe that is a lifelong friend of Hammer's, old school ECF fans know him as MICHAEL!"

He'll never love you, the way that I love you
'Cause if he did, no no, he wouldn't make you cry
He might be thrillin' baby but a-my love (my love, my love)
So dog-gone willin'
So kiss him (I wanna see you kiss him. Wanna see you kiss him)
Go on and kiss him goodbye, now

Na na na na, hey hey-ey, goodbye
Na na na na, na na na na, hey hey-ey, goodbye

Listen to me now

He's never near you to comfort and cheer you
When all those sad tears are fallin' baby from your eyes
He might be thrillin' baby but a-my love (my love, my love)
So dog-gone willin'
So kiss him (I wanna see you kiss him. I wanna see you kiss him)
Go on and kiss him goodbye, na-na na-na-na na na

Na na na na, hey hey-ey, goodbye

The lyrics to "Steam's" only hit catch on with the crowd as they start to sing along.

Banter: "Man I love this song."

Michael: "Making his way to the ring, he is the TRUE King of Kings, he is thee Original Muslim Gangsta, he has a boxing record of 49-1, but that only loss was total bullshit, so basically with an UNDEFEATED boxing win/loss record, he is the greatest thing ever to come out of Los Angeles, tonight he is accompanied to the ring by the very good looking for his age, spiritual advisor, the greatest most devout Muslim in the world, Muhammad Jabbar, ladies and gentlemen I introduce to you the man with the most dangerous right hand in the universe, get out of your seats for don't call him Frank, "THE HAMMER" MUTAAAAAZ TAREEEEEEEEF!"

Hammer enters the ring getting a very mixed reaction.

"Beating hearts baby
Baby is this love FOR REAL
LET me in your arms to feel
The beating of your heart baby

Sammy: "And now making her way to the ring, she is from LAS VEGAS, NEVADA! She is the former Aftershock & Tag champ of the world, this is the Queen of Hardcore, ALEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!"

The crowd mega pops for the hometown hero, she's not even wearing a ref shirt just normal street clothes.

She enters the ring and Hammer gives her the smoochy lips motion as that enrages Mr. Emo and this match gets underway.

Acolyte attacks Hammer with consecutive right hands to the face.

Tex: "Aco's really hittin' hard."

Hammer fights back with forearms and then they have a stand off.


IC: "Ooh that's a stupid move."

The OMG was definitely saving his punches for later in the match, so he just bitch slaps Aco. Now he winds up his leg, BAM, what a kick to the GUT of Acolyte.

The crowd cheers on Mutaaz.

Banter: "Would ya look at that Las Vegas is bizzaro world, they're cheering on Hammer."

Tex: "When you gotta chose between an Emo bitch and an Islamic Asshole, you always go with the latter."

IC: "Agreed."

Hammer gives Aco a Palestinian whip into the ropes and as Aco ricochets back Hammer gives him another bitchslap and laughs.

Tex: "Hammer's pimpslappin' based offense seems to be working well against his adversary."

Banter: "What the hell is he doing now?"

Hammer climbs out of the ring and throws not one but TWO chairs into the ring, Alexxx the ref looks on but she does not stop it.

Banter: "Great reffing job girlie!"

Tex: "Even though she has connections to both men she does not want to disappoint her home crowd."

Mutaaz sets up both of the chairs and takes a seat in one of them and gestures to Acolyte that he should do the same. When Acolyte finally reluctantly sits down, Hammer then gives Aco his right cheek egging him on to hit him. Acolyte swings and connects with Hammer's face, then a SLAP by the Muslim sends Aco almost falling off his chair.

Punch by Aco

SLAP by Hammer!

Punch by Aco

SLAP by Hammer!

Punch by Aco

SLAP by Hammer!

Punch by Aco

SLAP by Hammer!

Punch by Aco

SLAP by Hammer!

This goes on fore awhile, now Hammer breaks it by clotheslining Aco off his chair and then proceeding to stomp a mudhole in Acolyte, Alexxx tries to get him to stop but Hammer responds with "I have till FIVE sexy!!"

Hammer finally picks up Aco and teases throwing a suplex but stops the suspicion of an actual wrestling move being performed by clubing the back of Cordazer's head and then stomping a mudhole in him in the other corner, wash rinse repeat.

Tex: "I don't think we are every going to see a wrestling move performed in this match guys."

Banter: "Ugh, I'm going to look around the crowd now...hey look 411 Wrestling Columnist Steve Cook with some chick...!"

IC: "I think it's very scary that you don't recognize Jessica Alba but you recognize a wrestling column writer."

Banter: "Hey I got my priorities straight, I don't know about you though."

IC: "Ugh."

Since the announcers have been talking I haven't realized that Hammer has locked in a pattened P.C.P Lock, a trademark armbar of Purple Camo.

The crowd of course doesn't know that but you can tell there is trouble in the air when he does it, Alexxx's face starts to cringe, Stoner, & Yasmin raindown curses at Hammer, and Ghetto Fire straight up gets up and walks backstage.

Banter: "Sheesh these foo's gettin' all mad over one little move. They should just be happy someone is actually doing a wrestling move finally."

Tex: "Did you just say 'foo'?"

Banter: "Yeah."

Tex: "No one says that anymore."

Banter: "Whatever dang foo."

Hammer continues to lock in the lock when Acolyte somehow reverses it into a some sorta move...oh it's a crossface.


Acolyte looks confident in his attempt to make Hammer submit to that move, but Hammer NO SELLS it, and gathers up enough strength to lift Aco up, dead weight man, dead weight, he has him up on his shoulders and then dumps him with a BURNING HAMMER to the outside.

IC: "Oh my Gawd, Acolyte is dead!"

Tex: "Looks like Hammer definitely isn't done."

Mutaaz gets out of the ring and pulls out thee last weapon that anyone would've suspected.

Banter: "A ladder! HE'S GONNA USE A LADDER?!"

Hammer turns and looks at the announce table as if he heard what Banter had just yelled and waves a finger 'no'. Somehow the ladder has been set up in the ring already after Hammer threw it in there..hmm. Anyways Hammer pretends like he's going back before turning around and picking up Acolyte and setting him up on the Japanese announce table.


TCW is a very diverse place, yo.

Tex: "This is looking pretty chaotic here."

Before the OMG gets back in the ring he quickly turns around and gives a stiff right hand to Jay in the first row as his Stooges cheer him on, and Bob looks on...silently, Hammer then tosses Jay's limpbody into the ring, he climbs and throws Jay over his shoulder and starts to climb the 16-foot Ladder.

IC: "No way, someone call an EMT."

Hammer is pretty much at the very top and gorilla presses Jay, Jay must be at least 23 feet in the air, the camera flashes are going off as if there was a nip slip happening on the red carpet at the Oscar's, Hammer gives a good "FOR ALLAH!" shout at the top before throwing Jay with all his might..Jay flips once a pefectly looking swanton...he CRASH LANDS right in the middle of Acolyte shattering the table in to a trillian pieces and the crowd goes nucking futs.


Hammer climbs down the ladder then mounts the top rope and absorbs the crowds reaction, and all of a sudden the crowd ERUPTS in cheering, Hammer being the arrogant asshole he is; thinks that those are more cheers for him, but they're really popping for...

IC: "Ghetto Fire coming down to the ring with a bat wrapped in barbed wire!"

Tex: "Ghetto has reunited with Barbie!"

Ghetto stalks Tareef, just waiting for him to turn around, but little does GF know that he's not the sneakiest person in the ring as everyone has not noticed a certain spiritual advisor climbing the ladder.

Banter: "Oh My God what is that old man doing up there?"

Tex: "Jabbar is at the top of ladder!!!"

Jabbar screams as he jumps off, legs fully extended pointed towards Ghetto Fire..



Jabbar's old but stiff feet come right down on top of Ghetto Fire's green-corn-rowed head.

Alexxx being the good ref she is, pushes and shoves the two men out of the ring till they fall to rightside of the ring.

IC: "That was insane."

Tex: "Incredible..."

Hammer doesn't even realize just went down behind him, but he goes out down to floor and before he gets to his opponent, rips off the floor covering, exposing the concrete floor and taking Acolyte and looks like he's ready to piledrive Acolyte's straight into the hard rock surface, Aco somehow comes alive and lowblows Hammer right in the testiculars.


Acolyte flips Hammer the other way and out of nowhere.

Tex: "OH MY GAWWWD, tombstone piledriver on the concrete floooor!"

Banter: "This is just getting gross."

IC: "Acolyte just hit a modified version of his 'Ticket 2 Hell' move, on the concrete floor."

Acolyte looks drained as he is barely able to climb back into the ring; he uses the ropes to stand up, and somehow communicates to Alexxx to actually start a ten count, she relunctantly starts it but very slowly. Aco takes a breather and rests flat on the mat.

Hammer is hardly moving at all, crawling and creeping but he hears a Stooge yell out at him.

"Hey Hammer!"

After that all he hears is a clunk right next to him and he reaches out, and grabs it.

Tex: "What was that?"

Banter: "Huh, what uh I was staring at Jessica Biel..."

IC: "It's Alba, and I think you were checkin' out that Cook dude.."

Banter: "Grr............"

Hammer makes it back in the ring at Alexxx's count of 7 which should've been more like an 18 count.

He bends over in the far corner away from Acolyte and plays a little possum but he doesn't realize that his adversary has had enough time to regain composure but he realizes that at the wrong moment, Acolyte charges at Hammer with a big yakuza kick to face of the Muslim.

Hammer then screams out in pain.

IC: "I've never heard of someone screaming after getting a boot, to the face."

Tex: "I think he got a little more than a boot Cain."

Everyone else realizes this when Hammer is bleeding profusely out of his nose.

Alexxx goes over to check on her man and picks up a...


We see the action replay and Hammer had gotten a hammer from one of the stooges and when he got booted the back end of the tool cut into the Megastar's left nostril.


Acolyte tries to seize the opportunity by making the first cover of the match.

Alexxx looks on in disbelief and makes the count...


As Mutaaz kicks out, blood goes flying all over the ring.

Banter: "I need to puke really bad."

Acolyte corners Hammer into a corner and throws stiff rights to the face of Mutaaz, seemingly trying to rearrange his face and now he takes him up top, looks like he's about to give him a superplex, but then he makes it clear he's going for a crucifix powerbomb.

IC: "No way, he's going for an Aco Bombertizer."

Tex: "Looks like Hammer's landing might be the concrete floor too."

Acolyte is about to start the execution of his move but Hammer somehow counters it into another piledriver position and BAM!


Hammer's ass lands awkwardly along with Acolyte's head.

Banter: "Eww that did not look good at all."

Instead of taking this chance to pin the emo bitch Hammer reaches over and grabs BARBIE...

Tex: "Oh Gawd."

Hammer takes a seat on the back of Aco and locks in a version of the camel clutch with Barbie going across the forehead of Acolyte.

IC: "Look at Hammer just drive the barbed wire into Aco's head."

Hammer has been grinding so hard that Acolyte has developed a minor crimson mask of his own. Hammer breaks the hold and just starts taking the tip of Barbie and whacking it deeper into Acolyte's skull.



He then gives him one more shot, but he hit deeper than he thought, and part of the barbed wire is stuck on Acolyte's forehead skin, Mutaaz takes a step back but Alexxx wants to get it out but when she pulls the bat the wire rips out a 5 inch long piece of Acolyte's skin.


IC & Banter: :barf:

Hammer discards of the bat, and begins to stalk Acolyte, looks like he's going for the Jihad Kick, kicks! But Aco ducked at the last second Acolyte now gets Hammer in a leg sweep position, he's going for the Decapitator, goes for it and MISSES; Hammer did a killer boxing-style dodge now he steps back and BAM!





The match is over! All except about 3 square inches of the ring are covered in blood. Alexxx raises Hammer's arm high in the air.

Banter: "That match was just..."

IC: "Crazy?"

Tex: "Spotfest?"

Banter: "Awesome."

The crowd is cheering and giving The Muslim Megastar a standing ovation while singing along to "Na Na Na Na". Acolyte tries to get up by using Hammer's tights to pull himself up. Alexxx then helps him to his feet, then... BAM! Karate CHOP OF DOOM!

Tex: "Holy shit."

Acolyte is now bloodied and out and here comes Ghetto Grass. Hammer picks up Alexxx and is about to leave the ring when Ghetto Fire, Yasmin, & Stoner come in, they look angry, that's just probably because they haven't lit up for about an hour now. Anyways, they have a stare down but it ends when all the members extend their hands to The OMG and they come together.

All the members give Alexxx great big best friend hugs and Yasmin gives Hammer a hug, Stoner & Ghetto Fire shake his hand, and they give a nod to Muhammad Jabbar.

The crowd again ERUPTS and the camera flashes go off again.

GHETTO HAMMER! *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* GHETTO HAMMER!

And there's your picture folks- Mutaaz Tareef, Ghetto Fire, Muhammad Jabbar, Alexxx, Stoner & Yasmin posing down for the electric Las Vegas crowd.

IC: "What a moment."

Hammer then walks off with Alexxx down the ramp holding hands. And of course being followed by his Stooges & Michael wheeling Jabbar up the ramp on a wheelchair.


"He expects a show two days ago, yo. Two. That's a lot of days."- :coren:

Thu Jul 26, 2007 12:59 am
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Unintentionally Hilarious
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Tex: Folks, it's the moment you've all been waiting for and so, especially for Endgame and for this match, I'm going to hand you over to our guest ring announcer, the legendary Michael Buffer...

The Las Vegas crowd applauds loudly as Michael Buffer enters the ring, smiling and waving his hand to the appreciative fans. A microphone descends from the ceiling, drawing another big pop.

Buffer waits for the noise to die down before he begins.

Buffer: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall with a one-hour time limit and it is for...THE ECF AND 411FED UNIFIED HEAVYWEIGHT WRESTLING CHAMPIONSHIP OF THE WOOOOOOOORLD!!!!!!!!!!

The fans rise to their feet cheering and Buffer grins before carrying on.

Buffer: Introducing first, the special referee for this contest; he is a member of the New Hellfire Club, a former two-time 411fed World Tag Team Champion and one-time 411fed World Heavyweight Champion, ally to both of the competitors in tonight's match...Gideon Flint, better known to the TCW fans as THE ACIIIIIID MIIIIIIIISFIIIIIIIIIT!!!!

"Mommy's Little Monster" plays and Misfit appears on the stage, attired in the striped referee's shirt. Nodding slightly, he makes his way down the ramp, slapping the hands of a few fans before climbing into the ring and taking up a station in one corner.

Buffer: And now...making his way from the backstage area...
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We see a door backstage labelled Darkness and, after a few seconds, it swings open and the number one contender emerges, now bereft of his Lucifer's Championship belt, but looking as stoic and determined as ever.

Buffer: The challenger...standing at a height of six feet and one-half inches, weighing in tonight at 219 lbs...he is originally from the United Kingdom, but tonight he hails from CHICAGO, ILLINOIS....

Darkness reaches the gorilla position and, as he charges through the curtain right when the music kicks in, his huge pyro erupts on the stage. Calmly, he walks through the dying flames as more pyros explode down the sides of the ramp, surrounding him with fire.

Buffer: He is the master of the Darkshooter, the Slayer Slam and the Darkness DDT...a former one-time World Heavyweight Champion and founder member of the New Hellfire Club, he is the number one contender by virtue of his unparalleled success as a professional wrestler. He is known as the Man Who Walks Alone and is perhaps the most dominant force in the history of the sport...the Man, the Myth, THE ICON...this...IS DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARKNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESS!!!!!

The crowd are on their feet, the pageantry and iconic status of Darkness overcoming their memories of his questionable actions over the last few months. For his part, Darkness ignores the fans as he leaps up into the apron and climbs through the ropes. He enters the ring and immediately walks to the turnbuckle, which he mounts before raising his arms and bellowing in fury, soaking up the adulation of his fans.

Slowly, "Fear of the Dark" dies down and Darkness takes position in one corner, exchanging only a brief nod with Misfit. Michael Buffer raises the microphone to his lips again.

Buffer: And his opponent...
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Buffer: Standing at a height of six feet and two inches, weighing in tonight at 240 lbs exactly...he is originally from New York City but tonight he hails from THE CITY OF DIS, IN THE SIXTH CIRCLE OF HELL...accompanied to the ring by Selenia...

The lights in the arena dim and a circle of flame appears on the stage. Slowly, from below the entrance ramp, an immense black throne emerges. The object is covered in gothic rivets and spikes, framing the occupant with jagged blades and twisted barbs.

Tex: Wow! What an entrance!

Banter: Uh...shouldn't Dante be sitting in that?

Tex: Huh? My notes say...um...well...

The chair is indeed empty and the announcers and crowd are obviously confused as the music continues to play. Suddenly, a figure walks out from behind the curtain. As a spotlight illuminates the empty gothic throne, he throws out a kick, sending it tumbling over to one side, revealing that the impressive prop is made out of cheap balsa-wood and cardboard.

Dante steps into the space previously occupied by the throne and bows his head in the spotlight.

Cain: It looks like the World Champion didn't like the idea of that throne!

Selenia emerges from one side and hands Dante his belts as flames run down the entrance ramp and the lights begin to flash red. He holds the World Titles on his shoulders as they proceed down to the ring at an even pace.

Buffer: He is the master of the Gilded Cage, the Broken Reflection and the Hellfire Driver...a former 411fed European, Intercontinental, World Tag Team and Bleeder Champion, the former TCW Unified Tag Team Champion and the current and LONGEST REIGNING 411FED AND ECF UNIFIED WORLD'S HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF ALL TIME...founder member of the New Hellfire Club, he is recognised as the most decorated champion in 411fed, ECF and TCW history...more demon than man...the Earthborn...this...IS JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASON DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

Dante too takes up position in the ring, standing in the opposite corner to Darkness. He slides off his white leather jacket and hands his World Title Belts to Misfit who then takes up position next to Buffer, displaying the belts to the fans.

Buffer: This bout is the rematch to end all rematches, a true clash of the titans, the heir to what has been called the greatest match in professional wrestling history at Endgame 2006. Authorised by the Athletics Commission of the State of Nevada and coming to you LIVE from sold out Thomas and Mack Center in LAS VEGAS, NEVADA...

For the thousands in attendance...and the millions watching around the world...ladies and gentlemen...


Dante and Darkness step towards one another. Misfit takes up position between them. He places a hand between their chests and speaks a few quiet words to his two stable mates. Finally, he steps away and signals to the time keeper.

Tex: Here we go! The moment we've all been waiting for!

The bell rings and immediately the crowd let out a roar as neither combatant moves. Slowly, they begin to circle and then, to another mighty roar, lock up. They push back and forth for a few moments, seemingly evenly matched in strength. Dante begins to push Darkness towards the ropes, but the challenger breaks and brings Dante down with a drop toehold, sending him crashing face-first into the mat. Without hesitation, Darkness grapevines Dante's leg, but the champion spins onto his back, sending Darkness rolling away.

Cain: Neither man has the advantage so far - they're both so evenly matched.

Banter: Evenly crap, you mean.

Cain: No, I don't mean that. This match is going to be off the scale, Banter...

The number one contender charges, and gets brought down by a swift armdrag. Darkness bounces right up to his feet and then quickly executes a snapmare. He attempts to lock in a reverse chinlock, but Dante grabs him by his good wrist and reverses out of it, pulling Darkness up into a hammerlock. Darkness reverses into a hammerlock of his own but Dante jumps of his feet and flips Darkness over with a high-angle snapmare.

Tex: The champion is so experienced - he can counter anything Darkness throws at him. What kind of strategy can either of these men even think about employing, Isaiah?

Cain: I don't know if strategy is going to be possible. This environment is so intense, there's so much on the line and they both know each other so well. All they can try to do is counter and survive.

Darkness spins back up to his feet and charges, but Dante suckers him in and grabs the back of his head, trying to run his opponent over the ropes. Darkness goes over, and Dante, believing himself to have earned a moment's respite, turns away. Darkness skins the cat, however, pulling himself back into the ring, whereupon he blindsides Dante with a clothesline to the back of the head.

Tex: Dante makes a rare mistake, and Darkness takes advantage.

Banter: That's cos he's gone and found himself a good old-fashioned vicious streak. I like it.

Cain: Certainly Darkness has been employing more questionable tactics than we've been used to in the last few months, but the fans tonight seem to be behind him in spite of that. The fans are truly divided this evening.

Tex: As they were last year. Say what you want about either of these fellas, but you have to respect their ability, their tenacity and their sheer fortitude. They're almost superhuman.

Darkness goes right for Dante's leg again, attempting to turn him over into a half crab, but the champion rolls out of it again, sending Darkness tumbling away into the ropes. Dante is up and grabs Darkness's hair, dragging him up to his feet, but Darkness drops to the his knees and fells Dante with a jawbreaker. He grabs the World Champion's legs and begins to grapevine them around his own...

Cain: Darkness is going for the Darkshooter! This could be all over!

Dante manages to grab the ropes immediately and Misfit breaks it up, but Darkness doesn't release until the count of three. The challenger returns to the middle of the ring and waits for Dante to rise. He offers another lock up and Dante accepts. This time Dante gets the advantage though, whipping Darkness across the ring. He drops his opponent with a shoulder block as he comes back and then drives an elbow into his face.

Banter: Dante needs to remember what brought him to the dance. This goody-two-shoes crap has gotten him exactly nowhere in the last twelve months.

Tex: Banter, Jason Dante might be one of the most dominant champions we've ever seen. He beat Hammer and Highone this past year, and he won the Road to Glory. Put your personal feelings aside and respect what he's done, damnit.

Banter: Shut up, you.

Dante next snaps in a side headlock, but Darkness is able to get to his feet. He pushes Dante into the ropes and attempts a superkick as the champion flies back towards him, but Dante ducks and then lifts Darkness up into a standing fireman's carry.

Cain: Dante going for a death valley driver perhaps...

Darkness reverses, pulling Dante down into a crucifix pin, but it doesn't even get a one-count. Dante charges Darkness, spearing him into the ropes, but Darkness hangs on and clubs the champ down. He grabs Dante around the waist and tries for a piledriver, but Dante reverses and throws Darkness over his shoulder. The challenger isn't down for long however, kipping-up straight away and nailing a dropkick. Dante staggers towards the ropes and Darkness charges, bowling him over and out with a clothesline.

Tex: This match has already spilled out of the ring. This might be about to turn into an all out brawl!

Banter: Great!

Darkness climbs out onto the apron as Dante struggles to his feet and then executes a picture-perfect asai moonsault, but the champion dodges and Darkness goes crashing face-first to the floor.

Cain: Dante dodged! Is this where the complexion of this match changes?

Dante rolls into the ring to prevent either man being counted out and then lifts Darkness to his feet. He dumps him against the ring and then lays in a brutal knife-edge chop.


The chop seems to bring Darkness back to his senses and he responds with one of his own, which immediately causes Dante's alabaster chest to turn red.


Dante grits his teeth and hits back with another chop.


Darkness roars with fury and responds in kind, slapping Dante with such force that he staggers back against the ring steps.


Darkness charges, but Dante brings him down with a drop-toehold and sends him crashing into the steps.

Tex: Ouch, Darkness eats step. This has become a fight, plain and simple.

Banter: Uh...yeah...what did you think they were doing, Tex?

Dante rolls back into the ring and out again, before grabbing a handful of Darkness's hair and throwing him in under the bottom rope. He pulls his opponent away from the ropes and then hooks his leg...


No! Darkness kicks right out!

Cain: The first real pin of the match, and it only gets one. Neither man is going to quit here.

Banter: They'll kill each other first. I can't wait.

Dante picks his stable mate up and throws him against the turnbuckle. He mounts Darkness and begins to lay in right hands.










Dante pauses before the tenth punch, raising his fist to the crowd, and it's all the distraction Darkness needs as he grabs Dante's legs and brings him to the mat, slamming his tailbone into his knee and sending him staggering away in agony.

Tex: Darkness gets the inverted atomic drop there, escaping from those punches in the corner. What's your assessment of this match so far, Isaiah?

Cain: There's no way I can even begin to think about who might win this yet. Both guys are completely even, and I think we both know that they've only just begun to tear each other apart.

Darkness floors Dante with a clothesline and goes right for a pin...



Darkness stomps Dante down and then grabs his leg, twisting the World Champion over into a half crab. Dante grits his teeth as Darkness pulls back and claws towards the ropes. Darkness wrenches at his knee and sits down further, putting even more torsion in Dante's leg and lower back. Finally though, the champion grabs the ropes and Darkness is forced to release, but not before waiting for Misfit to reach four on the count.

Tex: Darkness seems to be focusing on the lower back and leg of Dante, possibly to set up the Darkshooter?

Cain: Almost certainly. Darkness is a former World Champion, and you can count the matches he's lost in his career on one hand. He's so methodical, so intelligent in the ring, and he makes it his business to pick apart his opponents in a way that lets you know just how much experience he has.

Banter: In other words he's over the hill?

Dante breathes heavily on the mat, recovering from the brutal hold, but Darkness has no interest in mercy and lays in stomps to the albino's back. He picks the champ up and wraps his arms around his waist before flexing backwards and driving Dante neck first into the mat. He holds the bridge...


Tw...no! Not enough!

Tex: Perhaps the first near fall of the match there with that bridged back suplex. Neither of these men have even begun to explore their respective arsenals yet.

Darkness drops a knee on Dante's leg and then places his boot on the back of his opponent's knee, wrenching the leg back, causing Dante to cry out with pain. Darkness leans right back, causing Dante's back to arch agonisingly too.

Cain: And here's that focus on the back and leg again. Darkness isn't wasting time with holds that focus elsewhere.

Dante struggles in the improvised hold, clawing at the mat. Finally, he begins to elbow Darkness in the ribs, eventually forcing him to break the submission. Dante rolls away and tries to pick himself up, but the hand he places against his back as he straightens and the unsteadiness of his gait indicate that Darkness's submissions have already begun to take their toll.

Tex: Dante is starting to look like he wishes he was somewhere else, I think.

Banter: Wouldn't you?

Tex: Yes I would.

Darkness backs up, crouching down near the ropes. Dante clenches his fists, preparing to take whatever his former friend throws at him. Without warning, Darkness sprints across the ring, traversing the fifteen feet between the two men with blinding speed. He launches himself through the air at Dante, attempting a spear that will break Dante in half but somehow, someway, the World Champion manages to react in time, hurling himself out of the way and sending Darkness crashing shoulder-first into the ring post.

Tex: Oh my God! That spear would have destroyed Dante, and all the impact has instead gone into that shoulder of Darkness!

Cain: I think he nearly shook the ring apart, Tex.

The number one contender staggers back, cradling his shoulder, and Dante immediately rolls him up into a schoolboy...


Two...no, Darkness kicks out!

Tex: Another near fall, but this match is far from over.

Dante presses his advantage quickly, slamming a knee into Darkness's face as he tries to stand up and sending the Man Who Walks Alone back against the ropes. Dante rakes his opponent's eyes and then goes for a vertical suplex. Darkness's reverses however and falls to his feet behind Dante. Immediately he slams a forearm into Dante's injured back which sends the albino down to his knees. Darkness wraps his powerful arms around Dante's head for a sleeper hold and then wraps his legs around his torso before dropping to the mat.

Cain: Darkness locks in a modified nightchoker, one of his signature moves, and Dante has nowhere to go.

Tex: This could be all over...

Misfit checks on Dante and also makes sure that Darkness isn't choking him. Dante seems to be fading fast and Misfit reaches for his arm. He lifts it...and it falls...



Thr...no! Dante lifts his arm into the air, and starts to shake with exertion. Slowly, he pummels his way free, bashing at Darkness until he releases.

Tex: Dante fights his way out! The champion still has a hell of a lot of fight left in him, it seems!

Banter: They really are going to kill themselves, aren't they?

Cain: Don't count it out, Banter.

Dante rolls onto his back towards the ropes and immediately slides out of the ring, collapsing to the floor in a white heap. Darkness picks himself up and massages his shoulder again before swinging himself out of the ring and stomping Dante down. He picks up the champion and spins him into a scoop slam on the floor before going up to the apron.

Tex: Darkness looks to be planning some sort of aerial manoeuvre...

Darkness comes off with what looks like a knee drop, but Dante gets his foot up and his boot slams into the challenger's jaw. Darkness falls right back onto the floor and Dante drags himself to his feet, using the ring apron to help. He makes his way towards the announce tables and begins to demolish the Spanish announce table, throwing monitors across the floor and taking off the top panel, hurling it away.

Cain: What does Dante have in mind now? He's sent the Spanish announce team running. Hi, Julio.

Banter: Don't hide behind me, you fat idiot!

Dante quickly rolls in and out of the ring, breaking up the count, before making his way over to Darkness. He attempts to pick him up, but Darkness rakes his eyes as he does so and they begin to trade blows. Dante tries to whip Darkness into the ring post, but Darkness reverses and Dante goes head-first into the unyielding metal pole before falling down to the floor again.

Tex: Oh no! Dante is busted wide open! I wondered how long it would be before this match turned bloody.

Banter: Darkness doesn't like to disappoint his fans, Tex, you know that.

Darkness ignores the blood welling up on Dante's forehead and drags him over to the semi-demolished table, rolling him on top of it. He walks back to the ring and slides in, only to be confronted by Misfit, but Darkness ignores his tag partner and steps back out onto the apron. He turns around, securing his prosthetic hand around the top rope and using it to push himself up into the air before releasing once his feet have cleared the rope and bouncing off it to arc back smoothly through the air.

Tex: Moonsault! A top rope springboard moonsault to the outside!

Darkness slams into Dante and both men smash through the announce table, reducing it to debris instantly. Darkness and Dante are both out and Misfit dives out of the ring to check on them.

Tex: OH MY GOD! Darkness just broke Dante and himself in half! This is carnage!

Cain: This match has to end now, Tex. Both men are out.

Neither competitor is moving, and Misfit lifts Darkness up, depositing the groggy wrestler against the ring in a seated position. The bloody Dante is clearly unconscious and Misfit attempts to shift him too, but the World Champion seems to return to life as Misfit lifts him, staggering forward and blinking the blood from his eyes.

Tex: How is he even able to stand? I can't believe what I'm seeing.

Darkness begins to stir too, standing up slowly. Dante snarls in anger and hurls himself at his foe, causing both men to slam into the side of the ring. Dante claws at Darkness's eyes as they grapple and rakes his face, sending him stumbling away. Misfit attempts to restore order, but Dante pushes him away and advances on Darkness, grabbing him in an inverted front-facelock and then driving him down to the floor with a brutal Broken Reflection!

Cain: Broken Reflection on the outside! This must be over now, for the sake of these men's health and the sanity of everyone watching!

Dante groggily get to his feet and picks Darkness up, rolling him into the ring. He follows in afterwards and goes for a pin, just as Misfit reluctantly climbs in too...



Th...no! Darkness gets his shoulder up!

Banter: How did he do that?!

Tex: I have no idea, Banter, but somehow, someway, Darkness was able to kick out. This is incredible tenacity.

Dante can't seem to believe it as he stands up and stomps Darkness down. He heads over to one corner and begins to unfasten the turnbuckle while Misfit checks on Darkness who waves him away and pulls himself up using the ropes.

Banter: This is more like it.

Cain: Dante is clearly desperate now, looking for any means he can find to end this match. Frankly, at this stage, I can hardly blame him.

Dante turns around, just in time to see Darkness rushing towards him, and then rolls out of the way, causing the challenger to go face-first into the exposed turnbuckle. Dante immediately pins as Darkness bounces back and lands heavily in the ring...

Tex: I think Darkness just got busted open too!




Cain: You're right, Tex, Darkness looks to have a wide cut on his forehead from that exposed turnbuckle.

Darkness is indeed bleeding too now and Dante shows no mercy, mounting the number one contender and pummelling him with right hands. Dante's pale fist is blood and he slams Darkness's head into the mat for good measure and goes for another pin...




Tex: How is he doing this?!

Dante grits his teeth as he stands and lifts Darkness up into a vertical suplex. As the challenger lands, the camera gets a shot of his face, showing what effect Dante's punches have had on it - the cut on his forehead has been opened much further and Darkness now sports the proverbial crimson mask. Dante too looks in bad shape as the blood mixes with sweat, soaking his body in red fluid.

Banter: Ew...

Cain: There's blood all over the mat. Misfit might want to think about throwing this one out for the safety of everyone involved.

Dante stands up and plants his feet firmly on the mat. He beckons Darkness to stand and the number one contender obliges, though from his groggy movements he seems to be acting on instinct alone. Dante raises his hands and, as Darkness stumbles towards him, strikes, locking in the Gilded Cage! The crowd erupt as Darkness tries to fight the hold but Dante won't release and turns him over, squatting down on the mat so Darkness has no chance of escape.

Tex: This is it! Dante defeated Highone using this move earlier this year and he made David Hardy tap out with the same move just a few weeks ago!

Cain: No one has ever survived the Gilded Cage, Tex. Darkness has put up a valiant effort, but he has no choice now but to tap out.

Tex: It's been one hell of a match, but the unthinkable may be about to happen - I don't see how Darkness can avoid having to submit here, for the first time in his storied career.

Darkness continues to try and fight, but Dante, baring his teeth through his bloody mask, will not release, and is in position to maintain the hold all day if needs be.

Banter: Thanks for coming, Darkness...

Tex: Let's not sell this man short; he's put in an incredible effort, but no one can hope to triumph against this.

Misfit checks on the rapidly fading Darkness and lifts his arm. It falls...



Th...no! Darkness lifts his hand!

Banter: What?!

Cain: Darkness holds on to consciousness, but he has nowhere to go. What he can he do but tap?

Dante wrenches in the hold deeper and Darkness's hand starts to drop again. Misfit raises his finger, about to signal for the bell, but Darkness lifts it again and keeps it raised. Dante roars and his muscles bunch as he pulls on his signature submission as much as he can. Darkness's arm is shaking, but it remains raised.

Tex: Darkness cannot possible hold on any longer. We know he's not the kind to ever tap out, but sometimes pride is the price a man has to pay for survival.

Cain: The pain must be excruciating...

The champion shakes is head in disbelief as he desperately attempts to tighten the hold, but now his own body is shaking with the effort of maintaining such a brutal move. Darkness's hand is still raised, with no sign of dropping.

Tex: How is this possible...?

Cain: Darkness will not quit. He will not die.

Banter: He can't keep his hand up forever though. Right?

Dante opens his mouth, emitting a loud shout of fury and effort, screwing up his eyes as desperately he attempts to force Darkness into unconsciousness, but the challenger's arm will not fall and finally, with no options left, Dante lets go, falling back on his side to the mat, the sweat trickling from his brow and mingling with the blood that still pours from his forehead.

Tex: My God...

Cain: He did it...Darkness forced Dante to break the Gilded Cage...I've never seen anything like this...

Tex: He would not quit and, as you said, Isaiah, he would not die. I can't believe what I just saw - a lesser man would have tapped out long before, but Darkness simply refused and hung on, waiting for the effort of maintaining the hold to take its toll. Amazing.

Darkness is on the mat still, breathing heavily. Dante shakes his head and stands slowly. He rolls Darkness over and goes for a pin...


Tw...no! Darkness's shoulder lifts from the mat!

Cain: Not even a two count! What are we seeing here?!

Tex: We're seeing two men who have gone above and beyond what I understood to be humanly possible. I expected nothing less, quite frankly.

Dante picks his opponent up, blinking blood from his eyes, and whips him across the ring. He lifts him into a powerslam on the way back and, with immense effort, gets him over and drives him down into the mat. He hooks the leg for the pin...




Tex: Not enough! STILL not enough!

Banter: This is getting kinda scary...

Cain: It sure is. I thought you were exaggerating when you said someone was going to die in the ring tonight, but perhaps you right, Banter.

Banter: I was right about something? Cool!

The World Champion can barely believe it, but he picks Darkness up again. He attempts another Irish whip, but this time it is reversed and Dante is sent flying across the ring. From nowhere, Darkness goes for the superkick, but Dante ducks and plants a boot in Darkness's stomach. The number one contender is doubled over and Dante spins him around and hits another Broken Reflection, sending both men crashing into the mat. They roll apart, both flat out on the canvas. Misfit begins to count...

Tex: Oh my goodness! This is exactly how their match ended last year!



Cain: Are we going to see a repeat performance from Endgame 2006?




Tex: Neither man is moving, this one could end with a double count-out. I don't think anyone wants to see that, but it would be strangely appropriate.




Darkness begins to move slightly, but Dante rolls over...

Tex: This is last year all over again. Can Dante do what he did then?


He drapes an arm across Darkness's chest and Misfit hits the mat, counting the pin...



Thre...NO! Darkness's shoulder lifts just in time!

Cain: NO! Not this time! Not this year! Darkness still has some fight in him, unbelievably.

The crowd are on their feet as Dante gets up to his knees and clenches his fists in frustration and pain. He wills himself to stand, feeding off the emotions of his thousands of fans in attendance and stands. Darkness is up too, his face a mess of blood, his hair matted with sweat. His face-paint has long since worn away and Dante grabs him by the throat and lifts him up. He looks into his eyes and then lifts his finger, holding it in front of Darkness's face for a long moment.

Tex: Whatever respect these two men earned from one another last year seems to have gone right out of the window now. Dante has had enough.

The champion spins his opponent around, grabs his arm and pulls it between his legs, lifting Darkness up onto his shoulder with a pump-handle, before driving him headfirst into the mat.

Tex: Hellfire Driver! Hellfire Driver! This one is over!

He rolls him over and pins...




Cain: Holy shit! Darkness kicked out!

Tex: This match continues!

Banter: This is awesome!

The crowd roar again, but Dante can't believe his eyes. He stares at Misfit before standing up and making a cut-throat motion. He drags Darkness into the corner and lifts him up onto the top rope, before climbing up after him. He hooks Darkness's arm and tries to lift him, but Darkness reverses, driving a fist into the albino's abdomen and sending him flying off the turnbuckle to land flat out in the ring.

Tex: Darkness reverses! Dante is vulnerable!

The crowd is at fever pitch as Darkness flicks the hair from his eyes and stares down at Dante. He slowly pushes himself up to his feet and hops into the air, rotating so he faces away from Dante and then hitting the ropes with both feet, bouncing back with a moonsault that covers half the ring. He slams into Dante and hooks his leg...

Cain: Astonishing moonsault! Darkness has the pin!



Th...no! Dante kicks out!

Banter: Not again!

Tex: Folks, you'll have to forgive me, my voice is going hoarse here. This match is just astounding. I can't believe either of these men can even walk right now.

Darkness stands, swaying slightly from side-to-side. He throws his head back and clenches his fists in front of him as the crowd rally behind him, all hatred for him forgotten now in the face of this phenomenal effort. He picks Dante up, catching him in a front-facelock before grabbing the back of his tights and lifting him through the air, rotating 180 degrees and planting the World Champion into the mat with a thunderous crash.


He pins...



Thre...no! Dante's shoulder rolls up as Misfit's hand comes down for the three!


Cain: I can't believe my eyes. How did he kick out of that?

Darkness shakes his head before standing again. He lifts his arm and then drags his thumb across his throat, signalling the end of this match. Dante claws his way to standing position, only for Darkness's prosthetic hand to shoot out and grip him around the throat. Misfit attempts to intervene in the blatant choke, but Darkness responds by heaving Dante off his feet and driving him into the mat with the Slayer Slam.

Tex: Slayer Slam! Darkness might have this one won...but don't put any money on it...

Darkness stands motionless for a second before he grabs Dante's legs, lifts them and places his own leg between them. He wraps his ankles around his knee and then turns, securing Dante in the Darkshooter right in the middle of the ring.

Cain: This is it! Darkness won his first ever match with this move, he beat Rachel Hunter for the World Titles a year and a half ago with it...will he win with it here, in this, the most important match of his career?!

No Dante grabs the ropes and uses them to eventually get up, but Darkness is quick to get back on top of him....DARKNESS DDTEEEEEEEEEE!

Tex: "Dante's head went straight into the mat."

Banter: "Noooo!"







Tex: That's it Darkness has won!!!

Banter: Wow...

IC: Darkness has avenged himself!


Darkness has both belts cradled in his arms he looks over at the battered Dante, and raises the belts in the air and lets out a victorious yell to the crowds approval.

Banter: "That may be the greatest match of all time."

IC: "I have to agree with you....Banter...."

Tex: "What amazing show capped off by an amazing main event! For Banter & Cain, this is Tex, saying, good night.."

The camera focuses on Darkness and the fading shot we get is of him clutching and holding the titles high in the air....

"He expects a show two days ago, yo. Two. That's a lot of days."- :coren:

Thu Jul 26, 2007 1:00 am
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